Sex in public: it’s one of the most common sexual fantasies, but unfortunately, it’s one fantasy that can be incredibly difficult to fulfill. You don’t want to commit an illegal act or risk getting caught–and for many people, the fantasy may be better than the reality. This is especially true since if you get caught, you could face serious legal consequences.
That doesn’t mean, however, that you can’t fulfill your sex in public fantasy. Try these tips for fulfilling that fantasy without the risk of getting arrested.
Tip #1: Talk it through with your partner first.
Does the idea of sex in public add a special thrill to your fantasy life? Before you get ready to act it out, talk it through with your partner. First and foremost, of course, this is one of those fantasies that you’ll definitely need your partner’s consent for ahead of time. While you’re talking it out, however, you can get a better idea of what it is that turns you on so much. Do you love the possibility that you might get caught? The thrill of having sex somewhere that you aren’t supposed to? As you talk it through, you may get a better idea of exactly what it is that you love about the idea–and, therefore, how you can do it more safely.
Look for the common element. For example, if you love the idea of having sex somewhere that you aren’t supposed to, you may want to try:
- Sneaking into a room at your parents’ house with your partner.
- Slipping into a coed restroom together for a few frisky moments.
- Having sex outside on the deck or in another relatively private space.
You may even discover that simply having sex in another room of your home–one where you wouldn’t ordinarily have sex–or engaging in sex using a piece of furniture that isn’t usually part of the fun can help increase your thrills.
On the other hand, if what you like is the idea of someone else watching you while you’re having sex, you may want to come at your fantasy from a different direction. You might want to consider recording yourselves together–and even enjoy going back and watching it together later. Get creative! Once you know what it is that excites you about the idea of sex in public, you can brainstorm ways to accomplish it together.
Tip #2: Get a little frisky in public together.
You can’t get naked and have sex with your partner in public without the risk of getting arrested. You can, however, get a little frisky without a problem–especially if you remain fully clothed. Some of the fun of the “sex in public” fantasy might be the idea of doing something sexual and private in front of other people, perhaps when they have little or no idea what you’re doing. Try some of these strategies to get a thrill out of your sex in public fantasy without taking things far enough to get in trouble.
Grab your partner’s butt or engage in a gentle caress when no one is looking. When your partner’s back is to a wall, you can get away with a little more than you can if you’re in full view of everyone. Wait for a private moment, then give your partner’s butt a squeeze–or have your partner do the same to you. Brush your fingers across his package or run them up her inner thigh. The cover of a table can be enough to allow you to get a little frisky without anyone noticing what you’re doing–and while the thrill of potentially getting caught is there, you’re also unlikely to scandalize anyone.
Grind against your partner when no one is looking. A light brush can be enough to tantalize. If you’re in a crowded public place, you can probably get away with pressing even closer, grinding up against your partner and adding a little friction. Sit on your partner’s lap in a crowded public room and wiggle just right–just make sure that you’re positioned properly to avoid squishing or pinching.
Use a bullet vibrator. With a high-quality bullet vibrator controlled by a phone app, you can stimulate your partner without anyone knowing what you’re doing. Insert the vibrator before you go out for the evening. It can stay off, gently tantalizing and letting you know that it’s there. When the moment is right, the partner not currently wearing the vibrator can turn it on: low vibrations to tease and excite, favorite patterns to ramp up the tension, or stronger stimulation to take your partner all the way to orgasm without anyone noticing.
There’s nothing visible as long as no one reacts, and especially if you’re in a crowded place or one where no one is paying much attention to you–at a restaurant alone together or at the movies, for example–you can likely get away with thoroughly enjoying one another without anyone realizing what you’re doing. If you’re feeling particularly daring, Poco can also be inserted or settled into place before you leave the house, then turned on later in the evening. Bonus: tantalize your partner all evening, then sneak off somewhere private for a sex session.
Try getting frisky in a car on private property. Do you remember those steamy teenage days in the back seat of the car? If you’d like to recreate them, try pulling into your own driveway, especially if it’s relatively secluded. You can enjoy your partner in the car on your own property to your heart’s content–with that added little thrill of having sex in a place where you aren’t usually supposed to.
Whisper or text suggestions to one another throughout the evening. Talking (or texting) dirty yet discreetly is a great way to engage in foreplay long before you head home for the evening, and it can give you the thrill of sexual play in public without any of the danger. It’s private, just between the two of you, though of course there’s always a faint risk of being overheard or having someone catch a look at your phone screen. Not only can those texted suggestions liven up a boring evening, but they can also help you live out your fantasy with less risk.
Tip #3: Try a little role play.
If you find the idea of sex in public a complete turn-on, role play is a great way to make it happen without the associated risk. In the privacy of your own home, act out that fantasy with your partner. You’ll get some of the thrill as well as incorporating some extra fun that could help enhance your sex life. Try some of these strategies to increase the thrill factor without crossing the line into something illegal (or something that could cause you to be unable to look friends and family members in the eye later).
Act out your favorite fantasies together. You don’t really have to be on a crowded beach when your personal deck (well-secluded, of course) will do. You can have hurried sex up against the wall with her dress pulled up and his pants barely unfastened in the privacy of your own living room or bedroom.
Take the same precautions you would take if you were actually in public. Make it fast. Don’t take all of your clothes off. Whisper and keep quiet, rather than allowing yourselves to cry out in pleasure the way you normally would. You can take it as far as you like within the privacy of your own home, where you won’t actually be seen or overheard.
Choose a safer location to act out your favorite aspects of that fantasy. If having sex outdoors, for example, sounds like a huge turn-on to you, make plans with your partner to act out that fantasy safely. You might choose to rent a cabin in the woods, where it’s completely secluded and you know that you’ll have absolute privacy, or to rent a private beach house, where you can enjoy one another on the beach without interruption.
Tip #4: Take precautions.
If you do decide to ramp up your desire to act out your fantasies, make sure you take the right precautions. If you’re using a bullet vibrator on your partner, for example, have a safe word in place in case things get to be too much. Planning an outdoor sex session? Make sure you have a blanket or robe handy to cover things up if someone unexpectedly comes on the scene.
What sounds sexy in a fantasy might be much less impressive when it happens in reality. Discuss your fantasy and plans in depth with your partner before choosing to act it out. Troubleshoot any potential problems ahead of time and go in prepared to avoid those problems.