A Mind Full Of Mindfulness

February 2, 2018 6:30 am

Just relax?

I either am nothing but mindful, or I haven’t got a clue what mindfulness really is.

I’m not joking here either. I’m told that having ADHD means I have trouble staying focused, that my mind is skipping from one thing to another and that this may be the opposite of mindfulness.

But what is mindfulness? I’m aware of where I am if you ask me. I can tell you what I’m doing, and possibly what it is I’m supposed to be doing.

But how is that mindful … or not mindful?

Mindfulness is …

Mindfulness is apparently the process of becoming aware of experiences that are occurring in the present, as in “right now.”

But I would argue that, in the ADHD mind, that awareness might be a constant.

You can’t travel …

… without a map. And you can’t change your focus without being aware of what you’re refocusing on. And we are constantly refocusing on things, and those things are right now things.

In fact, we are the kings and queens of “right now!”

Royal mindfulness, if you please!

And so, I respectfully submit to any and all, that the concept of mindfulness, much like the disorder of Attention Deficit Hyperactive Disorder, is woefully misnamed.

When people tell us we need to be more mindful, what they’re really saying is we need to stop thinking and just hold the current moments focus at a standstill.

Pulling teeth

And, I can do that, if I have to. But I rarely have to. And when I do it’s usually to be able to say I did that when someone asks me to as part of some therapy.

Because slowing down my thoughts to the speed of not thinking is like having teeth pulled without freezing. Okay, it’s more like having teeth pulled with freezing.

But why do I want my teeth pulled? And just to be crystal clear here, I hate freezing.

Brain freeze

Now there are times when my mind will stop, and allow me to take a breath and notice that I’m somewhere beautiful and that things are really good at this particular moment in time.

But … forcing myself to stop and do that is not comfortable for me. And in fact, contrary to what people without ADHD might think, it’s really quite distracting to do so.

So if it’s okay with the world at large, I’m going to decline to do the voluntary brain freeze thing. My brain stops and admires when it needs to, much like my lungs breath when they need to.

And in the case of breathing, too much is not a good thing any more than too little is. The only difference is that you’ll likely survive hyperventilation. And I suppose I’d survive hypermindfulness also, but why would I want to?

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